Montenegro – Maz On The Road

The silver lining to going around in a circle to get back to Montenegro was meeting Monique on the bus that I hadn’t intended to take. We bonded when she donated 50 cents for me to use the toilet (hole in the ground) at good old Podgorica bus station as I didn’t have any money left, having traded the last of my Albanian Lek with the bus driver in order to purchase the ticket for the next leg of the journey. Monique also shouted me a coffee as we waited for our second bus which would take me to the city of Bar and her to Ulcinj (that town that we had been less than 45 mins away from the same morning). It always amazes me that when you’re travelling it’s perfectly acceptable to swap numbers with a stranger and invite them to hang out the next day, but if you did that in the UK you’d probably get a very different reaction.

My final stop in Montenegro was ‘The Grove’, the only accommodation I had booked before leaving the UK as I had a feeling it would be my kind of place. The Grove is a beautiful converted olive mill nestled between the mountains outside of Stari Bar (the old town of Bar). After the usual half hour walking around in the heat with my bags looking for an ATM I couldn’t be bothered to wait two hours for the local bus nor haggle with the taxi drivers so I paid the rip-off price of €10 to get straight out of main Bar (there’s nothing really to see there) and up to the village.

The Grove has to be one of the most stunningly unique places I’ve had the pleasure of staying in. Incredibly spacious with a huge shared kitchen and a two storey open lounge area, the selling point (and it was actually up for sale when I visited!) has to be the massive garden with its own spring (pure drinking water), firepit and pizza oven. Add a few cats and chickens wandering around as well as a beer fridge operating on a trust system and you’ve got an instantly sociable setting.

The current owners Chris and Zoe also go out of their way to make it a friendly place, organising hikes to waterfalls and getting the fire going at night. This was the perfect base for 5 nights of doing nothing.

Group singalong by the fire

The next day instead of doing nothing I jumped back on the bus to meet new friend Monique in the smaller coastal town of Ulcinj. Beach days are better with friends and a female friend means you can visit Ladies Beach… despite the seedy looking signs this is not the Montenegro Stringfellows, it is the nicest, most comfortable beach setting that I experienced in Montenegro. The key feature of Ladies Beach is that no men are allowed – sorry guys! Two bouncer types sitting at the entrance were presumably making sure only people who looked like women entered. There are even green sheets hanging from the trees that blend in with the forest to make sure there are no prying eyes. Down the stairs awaits a gorgeous secluded cove with turquoise, sulphur water and caves to explore, sunbeds dotted around the rocks with a €4 price tag and a restaurant with a waitress who will bring huge plates of watermelon to your spot. I’m not sure this could get any better, with women of all ages and ethnicities feeling comfortable to wear swimsuits or nothing at all.

Ladies Beach – not actually a strip club

Ulcinj itself has its fair share of souvenir shops but this is offset by a lovely fortress, as is usual in Montenegro. There is a distinctly romantic theme to the sunset bars which we enjoyed with a cocktail and a wander through the cobbled streets until I had missed the last bus back. Apparently once it gets to 9pm the taxi companies have closed, but luckily Monique’s hotel was run by two amusing brothers in their 60s, one of whom disappeared into the night and eventually came back with a man prepared to drive me home, who was actually an economics graduate who lost his job in banking in the pandemic and now helps his father driving taxis.

Sound on for romantic tunes

‘Money Heist’ themed bar in Ulcinj – no idea why

Stari Bar is the old town of Bar – Stari meaning old – and has my favourite fortress so far. It costs just €2 to enter and is deceptively huge. Monique is the Queen of Instagram photography i.e. she takes sneaky shots when you genuinely are unaware so I ended up with what are likely to be the most flattering photos I’ll get for some time.

The fortress is well worth a visit, there is the remains of the tower to climb, the church and ruins of the palace, all with amazing mountain views of course.

The thing about staying somewhere special like The Grove is that it tends to attract like minded people. There were always people to hike to a rock pool with, or share a home cooked dinner in the evening.

Naturally we had to climb down for a dip

A day in Montenegro is not complete if you don’t swim under a waterfall

And that concludes Montenegro for me, having backtracked through the country twice I have seen all I need to and feel I accidentally saved the best until last. I’m leaving for Serbia just as the UK puts Montenegro on the dreaded ‘red list’ and just when tourism was picking up, as are lots of other visitors who funnily enough would prefer to spend two weeks in the neighbouring countries and enjoy the September sunshine rather than give a couple of thousand quid to the UK government in a ‘quarantine hotel’…

After one week in the luxury of the Mahakala Yoga Retreat I was itching to get moving, starting with the UNESCO World Heritage site of Kotor just an hour up the coast with it’s medieval old town and views over the bay.

My current style of travel is to book private rooms in hostels, giving me my own space but keeping the backpacker vibe. I was astounded when the Old Town Hostel staff led me out of the building and around a few corners to the ‘Palazzo Drusko’, who it turns out they have an agreement with if they are full. And what an upgrade! The attic level ‘Artists Room’ of the 600 year old stone house formerly owned by Montenegrin nobility, may just be the creepiest and yet best room I have ever stayed in, with Balkan music playing from an old radio and 150 year old furniture and antiques / paintings / crochets adorning the walls. See video below – turn the sound on! Although I was relieved to be able to turn it off at bedtime.

My palace room was located right in the middle of the Old Town, a maze of cobbled streets and churches and squares – the same churches I would end up passing multiple times as I wandered around in circles all evening.

Waiting to greet me on every corner were the Cats of Kotor who have been here for over a hundred years. They even have their own museum. I stumbled upon a shop selling cat themed souvenirs and was delighted to find out this was THE shop run by the famous Cat Lady of Kotor who cares for many of them.

I really liked the atmosphere in Kotor. It may be a little touristy in the old town but it didn’t cross the line into tacky and never got too busy to enjoy.

One of the recommended activities is to climb up to the ruins of the 9th century Fortress built into the Lovcen Mountains. A few people had told me to avoid the 1350 steps up by taking an alternative route that bypasses the €8 entry fee and involves climbing through a window.

I have no problem paying the entrance fee, I am a visiting tourist after all, but couldn’t resist the climbing through a window bit. The path starts to the right of the Resto Bar Taraca restaurant (great for veggie food and a favourite of everyone I met!) and it’s best to go as early as possible, I was on the way up by 7am to beat the heat.

It’s about a 30 minute walk uphill before you pass a derelict looking church (circa 1518) where some helpful red arrows painted on the rocks confirm the way. The most fun part was climbing up the ladder and through the famous window, which is confusingly accompanied by both a ‘no trespassing’ sign and a helpful red dot. Once you’re through, you can climb all over the fortress to your heart’s content – health and safety isn’t an issue here.

I was puzzled by the face masks tied to the bridge and still haven’t found out why they are there. A bonus of being up there early is you get to feel smug as the hoards of people start to arrive huffing and puffing their way up the stairs while you stroll down having just got the best photos as the sunlight hits the bay.

The tiny town of Perast is also worth a visit, reachable by either a bus or my choice, the boat trip for €15 which also stops at the even tinier man made island of Our Lady of the Rocks with it’s interesting origin. Legend has it that a fisherman shipwrecked nearby found an image of the Madonna and Christ on a rock in 1452, prompting the building of the church from stones transported from Perast and pieces of sunken ships. The custom of throwing stones into the sea in order to maintain the island remains as the Fasinada festival every 22nd of July.

The centre piece of the museum on the island is the small tapestry which is partly comprised of actual woven hair. The woman who crafted it apparently spent 25 years working away whilst her husband was at sea, eventually going blind and using her own hair in some parts – I wasn’t actually able to tell the difference but maybe it’s visible from the photo below…

Montenegro means Black Mountain so it’s necessary to see some mountains. To the north is the Durmitor National Park and the Black Lake. This would be best visited by car with an overnight stop but without my own wheels I took a lonnngggg day trip (11 hours!). But two hours of driving actually flies by when the scenery looks like this and you have fellow backpackers to chat to.

First stop was the Tara bridge with a very sedate zipline in my opinion. €20 for 50 seconds of flying seemed like quite a lot but as our guide pointed out it’s actually 56 seconds and that extra 6 makes all the difference! Naturally I had to do it along with Caroline from Ireland. We bought the photos that I did not know were being taken and as she put it ‘you had your game face on’ – clearly I was not happy she had overtaken me during those crucial six seconds.

A sad sight was the wild fires that are raging all over this part of Europe at the moment. As it got dark we could see the orange flames in the distance and more scarily cars ahead were stopping to put out flames by the roadside with buckets of mud. Even sadder to learn that some of these fires are being started deliberately according to drone footage, with the perpetrators not even kids but in their 30s and 40s.

The smoke cleared by the time we reached the Black Lake, which is beautifully clear up close and perfect for swimming.

Last but not least was the Ostrog Monastery, built almost vertically into the mountain. This does not deter the pilgrims who walk the 3km up barefoot. Due to a quick toilet stop I missed the first part of our guide’s introductions, but got the gist that it is very important you DO NOT LAUGH when entering the cave chamber where the body of Vasilije, a Bishop of Herzegovina, lies in rest. Also you may kiss the priest’s hand if you wish to do so (no offence caused if not). Obviously this made me laugh to the point where our guide refused to catch my eye for the entire visit.

It was only when I got into the cave and saw a large, living priest standing next to the coffin with his hand outstretched I realised it’s HIS hand you should kiss, not the presumably mummified one. I forgot the rest of the protocol in a panic and turned on my heel to leave without kissing anyone. Our guide confessed afterwards he had made that mistake when he was a teenager and he still can’t face going back into that cave.

Kissing priests aside, Montenegro seems to be a hub for solo female travellers. After swapping travel stories over dinner I had been convinced to add as many countries to my itinerary as possible within the next 7 weeks.

My final stop in Montenegro was Budva. Various people had told me it’s a big city and lacks the charm of Kotor but I had to see for myself. Needless to say they were right. I soon cancelled my third night when I experienced the heaving crowds in the old town, back to back sunbeds on the overcrowded beaches and Russian women dressed to the nines on their way to the thumping night clubs. All this amidst the stifling heat of near 40 degrees centigrade. Maybe if you’re on the beach with the €150 entry fee (to be fair it includes champagne!) or the owner of one of the super yachts you might enjoy it more. Budva is definitely where the money is.

Instead of the bars with rumoured £1k rounds of drinks, us cheap backpackers grabbed some two euro bottles of wine from the supermarket and a few miniature bottles of Rakia, the local liquor. Made from various fruit, it looks and smells a lot better than it tastes at 40%, especially when drinking it from an expresso cup.

Budva by night

Budva at least gave me the time to plan the next part of my trip and I found myself booking a bus ticket to that well known holiday hotspot, Bosnia and Herzegovina…

Tag: Montenegro

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