Category: Travel

Days 5-8, Campo Grande, Porto Seguro, Arrail d’Adjuda, Ilhéus, Itacare

The transport from the Pantanal turned up after all, with a minibus picking us up from the Jungle Lodge and dropping us off at the business hotel we had booked back in Campo Grande – there wasn’t a lot of choice and there isn’t much to do there. Bill hadn’t done us in yet, although Tom was slightly concerned that Bill had casually mentioned the name of his next hotel when he hadn’t actually told him. There wasn’t a lot of food choice either so not wanting to go far from the hotel in the dark, we found a Chinese around the corner and walked the couple of blocks having left our phones and valuables in the hotel safe.

We would have been sitting at the table all night if the nice Brazilian couple at the next table hadn’t told us you have to press a buzzer, which lights up your table number on a board, for the staff to come over. With no English available and our Spanish of no help, I accidentally ordered the biggest portion of vegetable tempura possible which I stress ate without noticing as the couple asked how we got here and expressed horror that we were planning on walking back. It’s very dangerous, they said – better take an Uber. You need a phone to order a Uber, so we asked the restaurant staff if they could get us a taxi – instead one of the male staff insisted on walking us back personally due to the drug turf war in that area. After letting Tom dealing with Bill for us and now a male escort home, we felt like bad feminists.

The next morning we started our trip up the east coast of Bahia with anther ridiculously early 5am start – a flight to Porto Seguro, then a bus and boat to Arrail d’Adjuda. The plan was to spend the next few days working our way up to Salvador. There are no direct flights so we had to fly via Sao Paolo – cue parallel universe moment where we disembarked, bought a snack from a cafe then followed the transfer signs through security and found our gate, only to end up back at the same cafe with the gate literally next to it. Top tip – you don’t actually need to go through security again when changing!

The distances are huge and the bus journeys long so we broke it up with stops in Ilhéus and Itacare.

Since our previous trips staying in Junkyards and Eco Lodges we have moved up to Art Hotels, ie guesthouses with random art such as monkey mosaics and mermaids by the pool. We flew into the tiny airport at Porto Seguro and got a taxi south to Arrail d’Adjuda (or AA as we called it) which included the fun car ferry, as it looked like a nicer place to stay rather than in Porto Seguro itself.

We went straight to the beach only to find the tide so far in that the waves were lapping around the plastic tables outside the beach bars (which were being packed away around us), and the only other people out were a couple of absolutely hammered middle aged women in bikinis who lurched towards us shouting “aye aye aye aye”. We decided to have a beer anyway before walking back up the hill to our Pousada, past the crazy women staggering up the same way.

It’s safe to go out at night here – what a novelty to wander around in shorts without mosquito head nets! We had dinner in a place that did craft beer for Helen and veggie burgers for me, and happily played Monopoly Deal without fear of being mugged for the pack of cards. AA has lots and lots of little shops and restaurants/bars around a square – it must be popular with Brazilian holidaymakers as we didn’t see many tourists. I was happy to find a shop that sold everything with skull prints although the woman was weirdly persistent in trying to get me to try on a long skull dress that I didn’t want, and we probably looked like lesbians again with me trying on outfits and Helen paying (birthday gift!).

We finally had a nice relaxing morning at the pool and made the most of the midday checkout. At least made the Brazilian guests laugh at our pronunciation of our next destination Ilhéus (nothing like it’s meant to be pronounced).

With everything still closed at midday the next morning and not wanting to miss our bus north to Ilhéus, we arrive at the bus station in Porto Seguro 2.5 hours early. But their handy luggage storage meant we could stash our stuff and go for a wander around the place where the Portuguese first landed.

We arrived in Ilhéus after around 6 hours on the bus. We didn’t plan on staying here originally as the Lonely Planet described the town as “rough around the edges” but I actually quite liked it. It’s home to chocolate production – we didn’t have time to visit a factory but we did have time to buy a £5 bar each from the hotel. We also enjoyed an authentic Saturday night at a local restaurant/ bar just around the corner with a pizza, beer and live music inside altho I didn’t quite fit in with the overdressed local women, still in my hiking shoes.

When it rains here it really rains – not wanting to miss out I followed Helen on a brisk walk around Ilhéus in the morning, actually taking my phone for some photo opportunities. This was probably not the best idea as the place was completely deserted on Sunday morning (what does everyone actually DO in the morning in Brazil?!) and the downpour of tropical rain soaked us to the skin. We passed a man taking a shower under a drain pipe. The old run down buildings did have a certain charm to them so I would say Ilhéus is worth a visit but bring a poncho!

Luckily our taxi driver from the night before had offered a decent price to come and pick us up and drive us the hour or so to the next stop, Itacaré (we had also been saying it wrong) so we could take all our wet clothes in a carrier bag. He drove like a getaway driver like most taxi drivers do, over the rollercoaster hills, but at least he didn’t overtake four cars on a blind bend like the ambulance did or spend the journey sending videos of other cars to his mates on WhatsApp like another driver had.

Itacaré is somewhere you could spend a couple of days, with its beaches and Bob Marley tunes coming from the cafes and bars and we met a few people who were spending a couple of weeks on the Bahia coast as their main holiday. We had a lovely vegan lunch on the beach and stroll around the shops, and saw our first game of Footvolley – super fit guys (and the occasional girl) playing what looks like volleyball but without using hands, instead kicking, heading and chesting it over the net. I loved the colourful buildings and relaxed vibe.

Ironically our hotel was called Ray of Sunshine as we arrived in the rain, and it had quite possibly the world’s smallest swimming pool out by the road. My favourite part of Itacaré was the banana themed beach evening meal – it turns out you can stuff a banana!! Never had a meal looked so like the photo in the menu and we could have bananas for main course (brocolli would not usually be my first choice to stuff a banana with) and dessert. Helen’s came with a side that she described as Dust which we later found out was Farofa (toasted or fried cassava) which you’re actually meant to sprinkle over your food rather than eat a spoonful.

After one night it was back on the bus again to Valenca. We nearly missed the bus due to confusion over having to queue to convert our e-tickets to paper ones, but I managed to use Spanish to get the bus driver to wait a few more minutes. And that concludes our the whistle-stop tour up the coast – next stop island of Morro de Sao Paolo via speedboat…

When booking the nature part of our trip, after doing a bit of research we went through a tour guide that the Lonely Planet guide book described as “the assertive pick of the budget operators” who we shall call Bill* and came across a review** where he apparently threatened to do someone in, but there were many more good reviews than bad and he had sent photos of himself with happy tourists over WhatsApp so we gave him the benefit of the doubt. We signed up for a four day / three night package inclusive of nine activities. The main draw is jaguar spotting but we knew it was the wrong time of year for that.

After a ridiculously early flight from Sao Paolo, we arrived in Campo Grande at 7.00 in the morning, the main gateway to the largest wetlands in the world – The Pantanal. We were met by a smiley, friendly Bill who took us to a local hotel for a complimentary breakfast along with fellow traveller Tom, also from the UK. As we got in the car, Bill asked “do you want the good news or the bad news?”. The bad news we said – that would be the “aggressive” mosquitoes who bite night and day, and that the fact that despite having booked three nights at the Pantanal Jungle Lodge, a large group of Brazilians were coming so it would be better if we stayed in a different place just a few minutes boat ride away for the last night which would really be an upgrade and anyway the Brazilians would be partying all night and keeping us awake. There wasn’t really any choice in the matter so set off on the five hour van ride after taking a selfie with Bill, then realised we never actually found out what the good news was.

I don’t think we actually left Campo Grande for the first hour as we turned around so many times it felt like a game of pin the tail on the donkey. After waiting at various junctions for local passengers or supplies, we got on the road. Halfway through the driver dropped and motioned us out to see caimans. This was no ordinary photo opportunity – three of four caimans emerged from the river on to the ground a few feet away whilst the driver threw them chunks of meat and treated them like cute little pets. When he beckoned me over to touch one of them I couldn’t resist (throwback to touching a Komodo Dragon) – it felt like plastic. Caimans are apparently actually quite friendly unlike full blown alligators.

We eventually transferred to a bumpy jeep for the last part of the ride and arrived at the jaguar themed Pantanal Jungle Lodge, straight into one of our 9 organised activities, a sunset boat trip on the river. Our official guide’s services weren’t really required as our fellow guests included Carlos the Costa Rican animal and bird expert tour guide and all round wildlife enthusiast and family.

We were glad to have our binoculars to get a closer look at so many colourful birds and some howler monkeys. We saw Caracara (my favourite), Roadside hawk (if in doubt say it’s one of these), Tiger herons and more types of parakeet that you’ll find on Hampstead Heath.

After a buffet dinner and chat with other guests it was an early night ready for the next days activities starting at 7.30am – morning jeep safari, “ecological walk” followed by afternoon kayaking and a nighttime caiman spotting. The jeep safari was less of a safari and more of an incredibly bumpy ride down a road, stopping every two minutes as Carlos spotted a bird nobody else could see, but we got to wear our comedy head nets that friends had leant Helen (thanks Stickie!!) which deterred the hoards of mossies. As Carlos’s wife said “at first I thought they were ridiculous but now I’m jealous”.

I quickly realised two things; it is true that mosquitoes like black (my dark trousers were covered in giant mossies) and they do bite through clothes (Helen’s top tip – put on Deet like body lotion and don’t forget your bum).

The ecological walk was nicknamed “Mosquito Spotting” as it seemed like a case of let’s take the tourists through for a walk through the woodland and not actually show them any wildlife. By now I’d given up on keeping the mosquitoes off my legs but my top half didn’t get a single bite – thank you M&S white linen blouse (now permanently stained yellow). We were sweaty messes wearing the same clothes for three days whilst fellow guest and native Brazilian Julia managed to look stunning the entire time with her brightly coloured linen outfits, naturally curly hair and mascara that stayed on. I literally watched the mosquitoes hovering around her beautiful outfit then flying away in the opposite direction.

We never got time to play pool or sit at the bar on the jaguar themed stools as we were either rushing off to an activity or too tired and it was never clear what activity was coming next but at least our guide Zinho spoke English. Kayaking was more fun – Zinho led us downstream so the current took us without the need to paddle. “Relax and enjoy the scenery” he said (the exact opposite of my Norway fjord kayaking experience last year which I still need to write about).

Night time caiman spotting was not nearly as much fun when you can’t touch them but we saw the southern cross in a beautiful night sky, slightly it was spoiled by the constant torches scanning for birds – no Carlos I cannot see “that bird that looks like a stick in that skinny tree to the left of that other tree”.

Day three was horse riding and introduction to The Dutch, four hilarious guys from Holland who had never ridden before but had their matching wide brimmed hats and were cantering all over the place. Instead of riding hats the lodge gave us plastic crash helmet and hair nets to keep the nits out which didn’t look quite as cool.

We had hoped to avoid moving hotels but indeed all of the European guests were being booted out to the “upgrade” hotel across the river. When I tried asking the hotel manager if we really needed to move, he just put a much less friendly Bill on the phone.

As we opened the door to our new home it was apparent it was certainly not an upgrade. The room was tiny, there were piles of dead flies in the corners and the bathroom was filthy – and we are by no means luxury travellers with high expectations. I had just got out of the cold shower as Helen ran in to check I was OK as Tom had just been electrocuted in his shower. It was bad timing that I had accidentally rubbed Deet on my lips, and was trying to cool them down by blowing air out in probably quite a strange way, which Helen interpreted as me also having been electrocuted.

This was enough for the ever patient Tom, who works in tourism and is way more polite that I could ever be, to complain. I don’t think I’ll ever forget walking into the restaurant area and hearing Tom on the phone to an increasingly irate Bill, saying calming “Yes Bill, I understand we have to move as the big Brazilian group are coming, yes I understand they would be very noisy, but I have just been electrocuted therefore I would like to move rooms.” Bill’s response to this was to blame us and threaten Tom with “The Girls are being difficult but I don’t want to have a problem with you Tom.” We all agreed Bill was now very likely to do us in, as per the original Trip Advisor review** but we still needed him for the transport back to Campo Grande.

After moving to new rooms that were semi cleaned and supposedly had hot showers that we were too scared to use anyway, the mood improved with the “floatation” activity which entailed being driven upstream and gently floating back on inflatable noodles. There were apparently no piranha despite the piranha fishing activity, and the caimans are friendly. Helen and I watched this activity from the boat as we took our cue from the native Brazilian who said she was not getting in that water. It was actually great fun watching the others scream as various things touched them under the murky water.

After some beers by the pool it was time for the outcasts to return to the other side for dinner, as with the Big Brazilian Group arriving we were also banned from meals at the lodge. But not before witnessing the arrival of the Big Brazilian Group – we watched as a bus load of retirees arrived with their wheeled luggage, clutching their pillows. Not quite the party group we were expecting but with a group of us we could see the funny side.

Dinner was also very entertaining – thank God for The Dutch. We had noticed a German couple who ate meals together but otherwise acted like they didn’t know each other and we had been pondering (or maybe gossiping) about whether or not they were a couple. The Dutch launched into an interrogation on how they met (only a few weeks ago when she was “facilitating a Tantra ceremony” and “he hasn’t graduated yet”), how well they knew each other (she said you need need to communicate in order to know someone) and eventually asking “but are you a couple??!” (as of this morning no).

The final morning only had one activity, “artisanal piranha fishing” which I obviously was not joining, but I watched the others sit in the blazing sun covered in mossies for half an hour before giving up – apparently nobody has ever caught anything as it’s a rubbish fishing spot.

We entertained ourselves finding an old review from 18 years ago calling Bill a liar and even more amusing overly positive reviews from someone posting as Fiona who was clearly actually Bill and subsequently kicked off the forum. There was just time for a late morning pool party before Bill came through on our transport out of there. Next blog coming soon on our journey up the coast, if Bill hasn’t tracked me down and done me in by then.

*names have been changed!

** totally unrelated review: https://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowUserReviews-g303369-d13970729-r866099680-Pantanal_Discovery-Campo_Grande_State_of_Mato_Grosso_do_Sul.html

Day 1 – São Paulo, Pousada Zilah

I’m on the road again and back in South America after around 12 years. Kick starting a two month trip in Brazil with none other than Original Travel Companion Helen, as is tradition. Helen is in the middle of her own two month journey through Argentina, Uruguay and Brazil and we have met in São Paolo to begin a three week trip around this huge country.

We splashed out on our first guesthouse (Pousada) to stay in a nice part of the city as we only had one day here. I arrived off of a night flight at 7am at the beautiful Pousada Zilah in the Higienópolis area. I sat next to a Brazilian influencer woman who in between taking selfie videos and doing her makeup told me she is from São Paolo and has never been to Rio as it’s so dangerous, and reiterated the Lonely Planet warnings that it’s not safe to walk even a couple of blocks at night. I cheated and took a taxi from the airport and the driver saw me safely into the Pousada where I was greeted by the lovely owner with a very strong coffee, just in time to meet Helen (who had arrived the night before on an overnight bus from Iguazu Falls) for breakfast.

Our Pousada was located close to the upmarket shopping street Avenida Paulista, closed to vehicles on a Sunday with a market going on. I needed a rest after not sleeping on the plane so Helen decided to go on a free walking tour. Sounds easy enough – until you consider the warnings of not walking through any dodgy areas, not trusting a taxi and the fact you’re better off leaving your phone in the safe – walking to the start of the walking tour proved to be a challenge in it’s own right. Eventually Helen set off having memorised the map and taking the guide book as a backup, and we agreed to meet back at the Pousada at 14.00. After a nap I decided to venture out for food – not taking a phone only proved I have no sense of direction or time. Having failed to find any of the vegan cafes I thought I’d memorised, I ended up in a shopping mall then just made it back in time to find Helen waiting for me. Really should get a watch.

In the afternoon we went on another walking tour that conveniently started just around the corner – the few photos I have are from Helen’s boyfriend’s camera which we decided it was better to have stolen than either of our phones on the first day. Tip for travel in future is to take an old phone or camera for photography purposes.

For the first part of the tour we had two guides, the bigger of the two acting more like a bouncer seeing off unsavoury types hovering around us group of tourists. The official Sao Paolo Free Walking Tour was great and I always take this type of tour where possible – it’s tip based rather than totally free and a brilliant way to get to grips with a city. Our guide Rafa was particularly good and we learned lots of facts about São Paolo, with a population of 12.3 million it makes up 5% of people in Brazil (although Rafa said 10%!) He also said this city has the largest population of Japanese outside of Japan and Italians outside of Italy which I have not fact checked.

We also learned that children go to school either in the morning or the afternoon, so that the schools can double the number of students resulting in many adults going to back to school in the evenings after work.

Along the tour we saw five mansions, one of which was now a McDonald’s and one a Santander bank. Most had it’s own story of a rich family who wanted to sell them but were prevented by the local authority designating them as of historic interest. Some had been abandoned or blown up so the government couldn’t get their hands on it. There were also some creepy looking abandoned hospitals. There is apparently now a ban on giant billboards including McDonalds. The guide pointed out lots of museums and cultural centres we would have liked to have visited if we were staying longer (although they close on a Monday!).

Japanese food here comes highly recommended – unfortunately without our phones for Google maps we could not take advantage of any of Rafa’s restaurant recommendations nor take an Uber to get there. But this is how we used to travel 15 years ago and for now it feels like a bit of a novelty and nobody can steal what you don’t have?! We would still prefer not to be held up at gunpoint so after the tour we aimed to find a place for a quick dinner close to the Pousada. Unfortunately everything is shut on a Sunday evening and the restaurants in the guidebook had quite possibly closed down entirely, so we ended up in a stupidly expensive Italian restaurant that was full possibly as it was the only open place around. It was also difficult to order without a phone to scan the barcode for the online menu 🤦🏻‍♀️ We quickly learned English is not widely spoken here and Spanish is not similar to Portuguese nor generally understood. When I tried to ask what an item on the menu was, the waiter brought out a plate with a single piece of plain pasta on to show me, as if I was a pasta connoisseur who wanted to try it like you might try an expensive bottle of wine. They also insisted on serving us each time we wanted to take a bit more and I realised after eating half a bowl of what I thought was a chilli sauce that it was probably fish🤢

It was worth the £80 a night for the jungle bathroom and large private rooftop balcony where we enjoyed cheap supermarket beers after an accidental walk home in the dark. No all night partying for us as we had a ridiculously early start at 3am the next day to start the “animals” part of the trip with a flight to the largest wetlands in the world, The Pantanal ….